Couples & partners intimacy coaching · Boulder & online Learn to want each other out loud.
For couples and partners (two or more of you) who love each other and want more: more desire, more honesty, and a kind of intimacy you may never have had words for.
What’s usually underneath
Many couples arrive with what looks like a sexual problem: a mismatch in desire, a shift in physical pleasure, a growing distance from each other, or expectations around sex that have never quite matched up.
After working with hundreds of people, what I’ve noticed is that underneath it all there is often something more foundational: a want that remained unspoken, or a deep belief that keeping silent was the safest choice.
Without knowing what we truly want, we can’t ask for it. And without being able to ask for it, we end up compromising, diluting, and settling. You deserve more than that.
- One of you wants sex more often than the other, and the topic has become a minefield.
- You’re close in every way except physically.
- You keep having the same conversation and it never goes anywhere new.
- Life (kids, stress, a new season) has changed your bodies and your rhythm.
- You’re opening or restructuring your relationship and want to do it with care.
- You’re rebuilding after a rupture or betrayal.
- Or things are genuinely good, and you want more: more play, more heat, more depth. Coaching is a fun way to charge up a relationship that’s already thriving.
“Learning that my needs can create relational harmony rather than harm.”Stephanie M., workshop participant
Slow down. Know yourselves. Meet each other.
“Knots tied in connection can only be untied in connection.”
Know yourselves more honestly
Each of you gets clear on what’s actually true for you now, not what you think you should want or what worked five years ago.
Ask, and own it
Practice asking clearly for what you want and owning that you want it, without pressure, blame, or apology.
Build shared language
Develop words for desires and for limits using tools like the Wheel of Consent® and RBDSMA, and use them to have the conversations you’ve been circling.
Bring it home
Practices between sessions, offered as invitations, so the change lives in your real life and not just in my office.
Couples & partners sessions
Joint, individual, or alternating. We find what serves you.
For three or more, we set the fee together.
My private office, or video from anywhere.
Every relationship structure, gender, and orientation.
Prepaid by card, Venmo, PayPal, or Zelle.
That’s a fine place to start.
Sometimes one person gets here first. Many clients start on their own and invite their partner or partners in later.
Couples & partners FAQ
What is couples intimacy coaching?
Couples intimacy coaching helps partners understand their own desires and limits, then talk about them with each other clearly and without blame. It’s practical and body-based: you learn to notice what’s true for you, ask for it, and build a shared language for sex and closeness.
Can coaching help with mismatched desire or libido?
Yes. Mismatched desire is one of the most common reasons couples come to me. Underneath it there’s usually an unspoken want or a belief that silence was safer. We slow down, get honest about what each of you actually wants, and find where your desires overlap.
Is couples intimacy coaching the same as couples therapy?
No. Couples therapists are licensed clinicians who assess and treat. Coaching is experiential and forward-focused, centered on desire, communication, and consent. It can be a good complement to therapy, and I’ll say so if therapy would serve you better.
Do you work with non-monogamous or LGBTQ+ couples?
Yes. I work with couples of all genders, sexual orientations, and relationship structures, including ethically non-monogamous couples and couples who are opening or restructuring.
Do you work with more than two partners?
Yes. Polyamorous and multi-partner relationships are welcome. We can meet with everyone together, in smaller combinations, or one-on-one, and we’ll talk through the format and pricing that fits on your discovery call.
What does couples coaching cost?
Couples sessions are $300 for 90 minutes, in person in Boulder, Colorado, or online. For three or more partners, we’ll set the fee together. Sessions are prepaid by card, Venmo, PayPal, or Zelle, and booked one at a time, with no package required.